How to Set Boundaries in Mentoring

Like any other relationship, knowing how to set boundaries in mentoring is essential. Boundaries refer to the rules, guidelines, limits and standards that are expected in a relationship and their purpose is to establish respectful and successful mentoring dynamics.

Why Are Mentor-Mentee Boundaries Necessary?

Mentoring is a two-way street. Mentees seek guidance and support from their mentors, while mentors benefit from personal growth, satisfaction of inspiring others, skill enhancement and extra income. For this exchange to be successful, setting clear boundaries as a mentor will help you to:

• Maintain a Healthy Work-Life Balance: A mentor, like everyone else, needs time for themselves, their family and other obligations. By setting boundaries, you can mentor more effectively, without feeling overwhelmed or affecting your personal wellbeing.
• Top Up Your Income: Mentees pay for a mentor’s time and expertise. Setting clear boundaries helps ensure that you are compensated fairly for your time and effort. Boundaries in mentoring help define the scope and duration of your sessions. By establishing these limits, you prevent yourself from overcommitting or overextending yourself.
• Keep Things Professional: During your time as a mentor, you may develop strong emotional bonds with your mentees. While this can have its benefits (empathy is one of the top mentoring qualities!), it’s important to keep things professional and not overstep each others’ personal space.
• Build Trust: Boundaries pave the way for a transparent and trusting relationship. When you set mentoring boundaries, you can create an environment where the mentee feels safe to share, ask questions and seek guidance without fear of judgement.

4 Examples of Boundaries In a Mentoring Relationship

The specifics of any mentor-mentee boundaries will vary from one to another, but here are 4 common examples of boundaries that mentors typically put in place:

1. Availability

As a mentor, you should be clear about the days and hours you’d be available for mentoring sessions. If you don’t want to be contacted in the evenings or weekends, make sure your mentee knows.

2. Personal Contact Information

To ensure your safety and privacy, it’s important to avoid sharing your personal contact information with your mentees. It’s best to keep all communication within the agreed-upon channels. At Career Navig8r, maintaining your mentor boundaries is simple, as all messaging and video conferencing is directly managed through the platform.

3. Scope of Mentorship

As a mentor, it’s useful to share the areas in which you can offer help. Whether it’s career guidance, skills development, interview preparation or something else, make sure you shout about the ways you can help your potential mentee.

4. Confidentiality

Have a conversation with your mentee about the confidentiality of your mentoring sessions and agree not to share information outside of the sessions or with others. Keeping things confidential will help create trust between you and your mentee.

How to Set Mentoring Boundaries

Navigating the mentoring journey requires clarity, understanding and mutual respect. Here’s a guide to help you establish mentoring boundaries effectively:

• Establish Mentoring Goals: What do you and your mentee want from your mentoring relationship? What will you talk about? How often will you catch up? Think of this as drawing your roadmap. Knowing how to set mentoring goals is your first step in creating healthy boundaries in your mentoring relationship.
• State your Availability: Just like you’d tell a guest when to visit, tell your mentee when you’re available. This is one of the key mentor boundaries.
• Decide on Your Communication Method: Will you email, video call or even meet in person? Decide how you want to run your mentoring sessions. The Career Navig8r platform provides a structured end-to-end process, with in-built messaging and video conferencing, and you never need to share your personal contact details with your mentee.
• Stick to the Rules: Once you’ve set your mentoring boundaries, try to stick to them. It helps your mentee know what to expect. As author Gina Greenle once said: “Honouring your own boundaries is the clearest message to others to honour them too.”
• Keep Secrets, Well, Secret: Just like you wouldn’t share a friend’s secret, keep your mentee’s information confidential. This is a crucial part of any mentor-mentee relationship.
• Communicate Openly: If you feel something isn’t working, chat with your mentee and tweak the rules. Open communication and the ability to give and take constructive feedback ensures that both parties feel heard and valued in the relationship.
• Be empathetic: Empathy plays a crucial role in the mentor-mentee relationship. By understanding and resonating with the feelings and perspectives of the mentee, a mentor can set boundaries that protect both parties.

Think of mentoring as the art of preparing your favourite meal. While the key ingredients (knowledge, experience and skills) are crucial, it’s equally important to follow the recipe (set clear boundaries). This ensures that your dish (mentoring results) turns out satisfying and delicious. Just like too much seasoning can ruin a perfectly good dish, crossing boundaries in a mentoring relationship can ruin its success.

Become a Mentor on Your Own Terms

Being a mentor is a great option if you want to work on your own terms while helping others.

The Career Navig8r platform allows you to:

• Set your own hours – there’s no minimum commitment
• Choose who you work with – view mentee profiles, send messages and hold a 20-minute discovery meeting to see if you’re a good match
• Charge what you want – top up your income and get paid for what you know
• Keep your personal information safe – all messaging and video conferencing is managed directly through the platform, so no need to give out your contact details to your mentee

Take control of your journey by setting your own mentor boundaries from the beginning. Ready to start? It’s FREE to sign up as a Career Navig8r.